Wednesday was the deadline for applications to study abroad. I had a lot going on last week, but I got the application done (which wasn’t too awful, because I wasn’t applying for financial aid or anything. I just had to get three or four different signatures). But as I grew closer to turning it in, I realized that I don’t really want to go abroad. I’m happy here.
I’ve known my friend Thomas since fourth grade, when we met at Jesus Camp. Since then, he’s been one of my best friends. A week or so ago he posted a note on Facebook about being divided between two cities (Birmingham and Nashville), and missing people from both places. This made me think a lot about where I belong—I’m already split between two cities. Adding another country could be too much. I’ve come to understand that I’m actually happier than I’ve ever been at this moment and in this place. I wish that I could see Cate more, as long distance is never easy, but all things considered I’m doing really well. I’m learning and growing and being and it’s wonderful.
My mother studied abroad twice when she was younger: for a semester in France during her junior year of college, and then for a full year in Switzerland after she graduated. She’s always talked about it as a really important experience, and has pushed me to study abroad during my college career. I was really worried that she’d take this new development badly. My mother and I have never been good at arguing with each other, largely because we’re very similar people and neither of us like being told that we’re wrong. Because of this, our arguments tend to be long, drawn-out, overly emotional, and thoroughly exhausting. So I tend avoid these arguments.
This weekend I’m home for Fall Break, which is really just a long weekend. I’ve been putting off talking to Mom about the study abroad stuff all weekend because I didn’t want to fight with her. Today, though (under pressure from Cate and my father), I called her at work, told her I needed to talk to her, and went to her work and talked to her for a while. The whole way there I was antsy, prepared for a fight, but when I got there it was totally a non-issue. She was on my side. I was surprised and thrilled. We talked about going abroad for just a little while, then talked about other stuff. It was great.
After I left, I talked to my dad, who told me that it was probably so easy because she had expected something much, much worse when I had called to ask her to talk (i.e. my girlfriend being pregnant or me getting arrested or something). So she was surprised and relieved as much as I was. Man.
I have a busy week ahead of me (with no less than three writing-based assignments due in the three days of class in the week), but I’m glad that I’ve gotten through the awful mess of study abroad applications. I don’t have to worry about that stuff anymore, which means that I can focus on things I care about. I’m happy, I’m writing, and that’s about all I could ask for. Cheers.
